Old Cooks Never Die, They Just Get Deranged   PainfulPuns.com - Edible Puns, Funny Food, Chef Humor, Java Jokes!

PainfulPuns Home
Animal Puns, Wildlife Humor
Bartender Puns, Bar Humor
Crappy Puns & Sh*tty Jokes!
Cheesy Puns & Sharp Humor
Clucking Funny Farm Animal Puns
Edible Puns, Fun with Food
Frightful Puns, Scary Jokes
Garden Puns, Green Groaners
Gnome Puns Intended
Painful Jokes & Groaner Puns
Monstrously Funny Puns
Work Humor, Joking on the Job
Old Jokes & Old Never Die Puns
Painful Puns, Punny Funs
Pet Puns + Jokes = Funny Pet Peeves
Sharp Pick-Up Lines, Cheesy Come-Ons
Funny Riddles, Punny Answers!
Sick Puns, Healthy Laughs
Smart Humor! Science + Math = Puns
Tech Jokes, PC Puns & Net Ouch!

And while you're here,
please take a moment to
visit our sponsors:

What did an astronaut see in his skillet? Unidentified frying objects!
Monster Chef Asks: What do you call a chef who won't try dishes made by other chefs? A. Full of himself!
Q. How do you murder a salad? A. Go for the carrot-id artery!
Gorilla Chef Asks: Where can you expect to find a stirring message? A. In a recipe!

 


Delectable Puns, Chef Jokes, Coffee Humor
Sample savory humor, delicious puns, funny food jokes and tasty laughs you're hungering for!

Edible Puns, Delicious Joking, Cheesy Humor
(Because Cafeteria Food Fights Could Never Be Mainstream Enough for Cheese Eaters or Cheesy Joke Lovers!)
Warning: Proceed at Your Own Risk! Unpalatable puns and underdone food jokes may cause nausea or heartburn.
| Funny Food, Tasty Puns, and Culinary Jokes | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 |
| Chef Jokes | Restaurant LOLs | Fast Food Jokes | Pizza Puns | Beef Jokes | Junk Food Jokes |
| Baker Puns | Dessert Humor | Coffee | Fruit Jokes | Bananas | Diet Humor | Tomato Puns |

Coffee Joke: In This Man Cave, Coffee Is Called "Break Fluid"Crusty, ill-tempered baker was a scone's throw from becoming toast.I bet my butcher $50 he couldn't reach meat on the top shelf. He said, "No. Those steaks are too high."

Q. How are men like coffee?
A. The best ones are rich, hot, and can keep you up all night.

Q. Why shouldn't you discuss coffee in polite company?
A. It can make for a strong and heated debate.

Q. What is fat, hairy, and drinks a lot of coffee?
A. Java the Hutt.

Q. What did they say about the old baker's favorite song?
A. It's a moldie, but a goodie!

Q. What did the butter say to the bread?
A. I'm on a roll!

Q. Which kind of biscuits can fly?
A. The plain ones.

Q. What do bakers do every morning before leaving for work?
A. Make sure their bread is made.

Q. Why was the steak a terrible gossip?
A. It wasn't juicy enough.

I don't eat steak often, so when I do, it's a rare occasion.

S-A-L-A-D: That's a funny way to spell STEAK!

Slogan at the local meat market: A good butcher knows how to handle his meat.

Food Pick-Up Line: Do you work at Little Caesars? 'Cause you're hot and I'm ready!I used to be a butler, but decided that wasn't my cup of tea.Q. What is a Thesaurus' Favorite Dessert? A. Synonym Buns

Yummy Pick Up Line: Biker dude is hungering for a pizza her!

Pizza jokes: They're all about delivery!

Q. Want to hear a pizza joke?
A. Never mind, it's too cheesy.

Q. What did the pizza say to the gorgeous topping?
A. I never sausage a beautiful smile.

Did you ever notice when you serve someone cold coffee, it makes them piping mad?

There are two types of people:
Those who love Starbucks, and liars.

Caffeinated Fact of the Day: Even bad coffee is better than no coffee at all!

Q. Which R&B funk tribute band only plays in kitchens?
A. Earth, Wind, and Fryer!

Roll right over that pun. Breader not miss the next joke.

Q. Why do we eat ice cream, cake, cookies and sweets when we're stressed?
A. Because Stressed spelled backward is Desserts!

Q. Why did the pie go to the dentist?
A. Because it needed a filling!

Food Pick-Up Line: You must be a banana because I find you a peeling!Q. When do you go at red and stop at green? A. When you're eating a watermelonThe coffee tasted like mud because it was ground a few minutes ago.

Q. What is a banana's favorite pick-up line?
A. Yellow, You!

Q. What is the hippest kind of fruit?
A. A bae-nae-nae.

Q. Why didn't the banana yell Hi?
A. Because it could only yellow.

Q. What is a chillin' banana's favorite song?
A. Mellow Yellow!

Did you miss that one on the state driver's license written exam, too?

Q. How did the watermelon farmer feel after getting a blue ribbon at the county fair?
A. Like a melon bucks!

Q. What do you call a serial killer watermelon?
A. A slaughter melon!

Chefs are pretty cleaver!

Starbucks or Victoria's Secret: Which charges more per cup?

Q. What is the technical name for coffee?
A. Break Fluid!

The worst part of waking up, from a nap, is Folger's in your lap!

Chef Pick-Up Line: Hey babe, you remind me of my spice cabinet because you've got a fine grind goin' on!

Food Joke: A man assaulted me with milk, cream, and butter. How Dairy!Java Joke: What kind of coffee was served on the Titanic? SankaHave You Ever Tried to Eat a Clock? It's Very Time Consuming

Q. Why did this cow jump over the moon?
A. The farmer had cold hands.

Q. What do you get if you put a cow on a trampoline?
A. A milk shake.

Q. Why did the blonde farmer get a brown cow?
A. She wanted chocolate milk.

Q. What do you get if you cross a cow and a duck?
A. Milk and Quackers!

Q. What is the most jittery Beatles' song?
A. Latte Be.

Q. Why is Starbucks removing the trans-fat from their menu?
A. They want that Frappuccino to pad your ass without clogging your arteries.

Did you know it's a sin for a woman to make coffee? Yeah, in the Bible it says "He Brews."

Did you know that the Greek god, Pan, loved cooking utensils?

Yeah, and it's likely the next big diet fad to gross a billion dollars.

Workout Wisecrack: I would tell you a gym joke, but you'll have to weight for it...

Did you hear about the fish chef? He has a lox on his plate...

Q. What is a salad chef's favorite novel?
A. War and Peas.

Workout Wisecrack: I love doing crunches: Doritos, popcorn, pretzels...

| Funny Food, Tasty Puns, Culinary Jokes | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 |
| Burger Puns | 2 | 3 | Hot Dog LOLs | Beef Jokes | 2 | Butter | Snack | Diet | Chef Come-Ons |
| Chef Jokes | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | Italian Food Puns | 2 | 3 | Restaurant Humor | 2 | 3 | Tex-Mex |
| Funny Carrots | Pickle Puns | 2 | 3 | Potato | Salad Laughs | Tomato Jokes | Veggie Humor |
| Fruit Humor | 2 | 3 | Apple Jokes | Banana Funs | 2 | 3 | Lemon | Orange Puns | Strawberry |
| Baker Jokes | 2 | Dessert Puns | 2 | Beverage Humor | Coffee | 2 | Soda Funny | Wine |


PainfulPuns Home
You've lasted this far, so here's even more delicious humor, tasty jokes,
and inedible painful puns that'll satisfy your appetite for cheesy jokes:

More Painful Puns, Groaners Jokes, and Unanswered Riddles...

| Cheesy Puns | Colorado Jokes | Craft Beer LOLs | Fit Puns | Funny Farm | Gnome Nonsense | Gym Puns |
| Munchie Jokes | Music Memes | Old Never Die Jokes | Pet Puns | Pitiful Pick-Up Lines | Riddles? |
| Scary Funny Humor | Sci-Fi Funnies | Fun Seasonal Puns | Sports Jokes | Tech Puns | Weed Is Funny! |

Painful Jokes & Groaner Puns Bartender Puns, Bar Humor Funny Riddles, Punny Answers!
Cheesy Puns & Sharp Humor Garden Puns, Green Groaners Work Humor, Joking on the Job

Thanks for stopping by and see you again soon!

Join us on social media and please feel free to share our memes with friends and family:
PainfulPuns at Facebook PainfulPuns at Twitter PainfulPuns at Pinterest

©2017-2019 Painfulpuns.com PainfulPuns.com Logo Man All rights reserved.