Q. What do you get if you cross a crow with Super Glue?
A. A caw-stick compound.

Q. How do you describe the appetite of a hungry crow in a corn field?
A. Ravenous.

Q. Why were noisy crows hanging out on the road above the river embankment?
A. 'Cause it was a caws-way.

Q. Why was the raven dressed like a scarecrow?
A. It was his Halloween cawstume.

Q. What do you call an autograpgh from a celebrity swan?
A. A cygnet-ture.

Q. What do you get if you cross a swan with a loon?
A. A swoon.

Q. What do you get if you cross a swan wth a drunken pig?
A. Swine.

Q. Which bird can only be seen on clear nights during the summer and autumn months in the Northern Hemisphere?
A. Cygnus.

Q. Which kind of bird was exhiled on an isand along with Napleon?
A. The Elba-tross.

Q. Which large bird flies around with its wings bent?
A. An elbow-tross.

Q. What do you get when you cross songbirds with North American wild cats?
A. Bob-o-lynx.

Q. Why do bobolinks hate their name?
A. 'Cause birds don't like being associated with two kinds of wild cats.

Q. What is the most legendary bird?
A. The Pel-Icon.

Q. What is a really tall emu called?
A. An Os-stretch.

Q. What do you call a weird bird with his head in a hole in the groind?
A. Oddstritch.

Q. Which bird native to the Northwest has the best vision?
A. A Seattle See-hawk.

Q. What is the most common type of urban owl violence?
A. Drive by hooting.

Q. What do you call a fugitive nocturnal bird that's about to be apprehended?
A. A Spotted Owl.

Q. Where are dangerous owl criminals incarcerated?
A. Owlcatraz.

Q. What happens when an owl gets a sore throat?
A. He doesn't give a hoot.

Q. What do you get if you cross a flat-faced little dog with an Antarctic bird?
A. A Pug-uin.

Q. What was the penguin standup comedian hoping for at the Comedy Club?
A. Pun grins.

Q. Which kind of ex jailbird can be hired to intimidate or rough up others?
A. The pen-goon.

Q. What do you get if you cross a mouse with an eagle?
A. An Eek-le.

Q. What do people in San Juan Capistrano call a solitary bird?
A. A swal-lone.

Q. What is the scariest bird holiday in October?
A. Swallow-een.

Q. What is the opposite of a swallow?
A. A swal-high.

Q. Whic kind of bird can borrow you some money?
A. The swal-loan.

Q. What does the psychiatrist in Phoenix call his pet roadrunner?
A. Cuckoo.

Q. What did the seahawk say to the sea eagle?
A. It's your tern.

Q. Which kind of bird is a notorious jailbird?
A. The Fal-Con.

Q. What is an electrician's favorite kind of avian?
A. The OHMing bird.

Q. Why didn't the Macaw think he'd be convicted of the crime?
A. Because he was wasn't a jail bird.

Q. Why couldn't anybody see the rare parrot in the jungle?
A. 'Cause it was in da skies!

Q. Are Painful parrot Puns funny?
A. Yes, they're the squawk of the town!

Q. Which kind of glue does a Cockatiel use?
A. Polly-urethane.

Q. What do you get if you cross an oyster with a big-billed shore bird?
A. A Pearl-ican.

Q. What do you get if you cross a Gallup-ing horse with a big-billed shore bird?
A. Poll-ican.

Q. Which big shore bird is in love with Barbie?
A. Peli-Ken.

Q. Which kind of shore bird likes to play in the sand on the beach?
A. The Pail-can

Q. What do you call a big-billed avian drug addict?
A. Pill-ican.

Q. Why was the big Macaw in the top of the jungle canopy screaming at all the little parrots below him?
A. 'Cause he was the Branch manager.

Q. What do you get when you cross a centipede with a parrot?
A. A walky talky.

Q. What's the difference between a lawyer and a vulture?
A. The lawyer gets frequent flyer miles.

Q. What's the difference between lawyers and buzzards?
A. Lawyers have removable wingtips.

Q. What do you call a raptor that fights a black bear over a trout?
A. Bold Eagle.

Q. What do yhu call a smoking hot Florida wading bird?
A. Flame-ingo.

Q. Which kind of bird grows all the food his flock needs?
A. The Farmingo.

Q. Which kind of bird is a real stickler for properly filed paperwork?
A. The form-ingo.

Q. What do you call a raptor in an over-heated hot tub?
A. Boiled Eagle.

Q. What do you call an eagle before it's hatched?
A. Egg-le.

Q. Are the small songbirds in your backyard strangers?
A. No, they know each other from way back wren.

Q. Which state has the largest population of sparrows and small garden songbirds?
A. Wrensylvania.

Q. Which feathered French philosopher said "I think, therefore I am.?"
A. Wrene Descartes.

Q. Where do Colorado songbirds like to ski in the spring?
A. Wren-ter Park.

Q. What did the bird vet recommend for the ailing avian?
A. Robin bed rest.

Q. What do you get if you cross a red-breasted bird with an owl?
A. Robin Hoo-ed.

Q. What do you call a bird that's relaxing on a sunny beach and eating ice cream?
A. Baskin' Robin.

Q. What do you call a backyard bird with air sickness?
A. Robin green-breast.

Q. What kind of bird doesn't need a comb?
A. A bald eagle.

Q. How do robins stay so fit?
A. They do lots of morning worm-ups.

Avian Pick-Up Line: Hey chicky, do you like Bald Eagles? 'Cause I can make you soar.

Q. What do you get if you cross a dog and a tern?
A. A Beagle.

Q. What do you call a bird catchng a ride on a tow truck?
A. Hauled eagle.

Q. What do you get if you cross a snake with a promiscuous love bird?
A. A ssswinger.

Q. Which kind of affectionate bird is always close at hand?
A. The glove bird.

Q. Why were the homing pigeons still happily married after all these years?
A. Because they’re so lovey-dovey.

Q. Which shampoo do pet Love Birds prefer?
A. Dove.

Q. What do you get if you cross a big-billed jungle bird with a walking stick?
A. A Toucane.

Q. What do you call a bald jungle bird wearing a wig?
A. A Toupee.

Q. What do you call a double-take by a big-beaked jungle bird?
A. A tou-scan.

Q. What do you call a North American raptor that had been crying?
A. Bawled eagle.

Q. Which Beatles song do owls still dig?
A. Owl You Need Is Love.

Q. What is a love bird's favorite song lyric?
A. Isn't It Crow Mantic.

Q. Which kind of bird chants instead of singing?
A. The Om-ing bird.

Q. Which kind of bird can't sing at all?
A.A mum-ming bird.

Q. What is a lovebird BFF?
A. Best Friends For Feather.

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