Fish Jokes, Sturgeon Puns, Tuna Humor 3

Deep Sea Fish Jokes, Sturgeon Puns, Tuna Grins
(Because Angelfish Puns and Holy Mackerel Jokes Could Never Be TOO Mainstream for Monkfish During Lwnt!)

Q. What do you get if you cross a trout and an apartment? a. A flat fish!

Q. What do you call a smelly fish? A.. A Stink Ray!

Q What does the Pope eat during Lent? A. Hly Mackerel!

Q. Why was the flatfish kicked out of the ocean orchestra?
A. 'Cause he was always off key.

Q. What is it called when baby flatfish are learning how to swim?
A. Floundering.

Q. Which sea creature can't wear high heels?
A. The flatfish.

Q. Which kind of fish bounces around the ocean floor?
A. The spring ray.

Q. Which kind of fish can't be bathed in hot water?
A. The shrink ray.

Q. Which kind of fish is worth a lot of money?
A.The minta ray.

Q. How do you describe a mackerel that needs everything to be just so?
A. Finicky.

Q. What do you get if you cross a chimp with a flounder?
A. A monkfish.

Q. Why do mackerels do so badly in school?
A. Because they work well below C level.

Q. What do romantic fish sing to each other? A. Salmon Chanted Evening!

q. Why is a swordfish's nose 11 inches long? A. If it was 12 inches, it would be a foot!

Q. What happens if you put Nutella on salmon? A. You get Salmonella!

Q. Which musicians are a river fish's favorite folk rock duo?
A. Salmon and Garfinkle.

Q. Which party game do fish enjoy playing most?
A. Salmon Says.

Q. What kind of fish plays the guitar?
A. Bassist.

Q. What do you get if you cross a sea eagle with a long-nosed fish?
A. A soared-fish.

Q. What do you call a fish that organizes everything on the ocean floor?
A. Assort-fish.

Q. What ?do you call a long-nosed fish suffering from a sunburn
A. So red fish.

Q. What to you get if yu cross a nut with a pinkish fish?
A. A salmond.

Q. What is the opposite of salmon?
A. Salmoff.

Q. What is a salmon's favorite part of a river race?
A. The FINish line.

Q. What do you call a big fish that makes you an offer you can't refuse? A. Codfather!

Q. What kind of fish can give you a face-lift? A. A plastic sturgeon!

Q. Which fish was the Tsar of Russia's favorite? a. Tsardines!

Q. What do you get if you cross a fish with an eel?
A. An electrical cod.

Q. Who is the best poker player in the ocean?
A. The cod shark.

Q. When little fishies say their bedtime prayers, who do they pray to?
A. Cod.

Q. What do you call a fish that's locked up in the sea jail?
A. Stir-geon.

Q. What do you get if you cross a bull with a big fish?
A. A steer-geon.

Q. What do you call a fish that's on vaction from work?
A. Sturge-off.

Q. What do you call rotten fish in a can?
A. Sour-dines.

Q. Which kind of fish can you find off the coast of California?
A. Big Sur-dines

Q. What do you get if you cross a sea eagle with little silver fish?
A. Soar-dines.

Q. What's the difference between a piano and a fish? A. You can tune a piano, but you can't tuna fish!

Q. What do you get if you cross an abbot and a trout? a. A Monkfish!

Q. What do you call a slippery reporter? A. A koi-respondent!

Q. Which fish had me down, down, down on my knees?
A. Barracuda by Heart.

Q. What do you call a fish who wears an ascot?
A. So fish-ticated!

Q. What did the fish say when he posted bail?
A. I'm off the hook!

Q. Which type of fish goes to heaven when it dies?
A. The Angelfish.

Q. Which kiind of fish never goes to church?
A. The sin fish.

Fishy Come-On Line: Hey fella, I see you're on the small side. But don't worry, 'cause I won't throw you back.

Q. What happened after Channel 9 hired a fishy tabloid reporter to do human interest stories?
A. The station's ratings really tanked.

Q. Why are goldfish orange?
A. The water makes them rusty.

Fishy Pick-Up Line: Hey Wanda, tonight I'd like to take a dip in your pond.

Fish says: You'd think sunfish would like Sundays, but they don't!

Q. Which sea creature can be adjusted to play music? A. A tune-a-afish!

Q. How do fish know how much they weigh? A. they have their own scales!

Q. What do you get if you cross a sun fish with a big fish?
A. A star-geon.

Q. Which kind of fish is a true family man?
A. The son fish.

Q. Which type of fish goes upstream at 90 MPH?
A. The Motor Pike.

Q. Which game show do fish enjoy most?
A. Name That Tuna!

Q. Which kind of fish always exaggerates and tells whopper stories?
A. The true-nah fish.

Q. Which fish likes to hang out at the Sand Bar?
A. Dune-a fish.

Fishy Hookup Line: Hey big guy, I'm guessing you must be a good 12 inches, 'cause you're a real keeper.

Q. What do fish need to stay healthy?
A. Vitamin Sea.

Q. What's the difference between a lawyer and a catfish?
A. One is a slimy scum-sucking bottom feeder. The other is a fish.

You've hooked a big grin, so here's even more salty laughter, tidy jokes,
curremt humor and fin-tastic painful puns that aren't all wet:

More Painful Puns, Groaner Jokes, and Unanswered Riddles...

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