Q. Why did the ant fall off the toilet seat? A. He was pissed off!   PainfulPuns.com - Animal Puns, Wildlie Humor, Beary Funny Jokes!

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Q. How much money does a skunk have? A. One Cent!
Q. Which national parks icon do locksmiths trust to preven forest fires? A. Smokey the Bear!
Q. What do you get if you cross an alligator and a pickle? A. A crocodill!
NASA just put a bunch of Holsteins into low earth orbit. Missioin name: The Herd Shot 'Round the World

 


Animal Jokes, Bearly Funny Puns, Critter Humor
Track down wildlife humor, fauna animal puns, creature comedy and funny wild animal jokes.

Wild Animal Puns and Funny Wildlife Jokes
(Because Tame Humor Could Never Be TOO Mainstream for Nature Lovers and Fans of Wild Animal Jokes!)
Warning: Proceed at Your Own Risk! Menagerie humor, wildlife jokes, and funny wild animal puns ahead.
| Wildly Funny Wild Animal Jokes | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | 14 | 15 |
| Gorilla Jokes and Big Ape Puns | Bigfoot Jokes | Sasquatch Jokes | Colorado Bigfoot Jokes |
| Cheeky Monkey Jokes | Stoner Monkey Jokes | 2 | Animal Pothead Puns | Animal Bar Jokes |
| Elephant Jokes, Mammoth Puns | Lion Jokes, Big Cat Puns | Colorado Wildlife Jokes | 2 | 3 |
| Bear Jokes | Deer Jokes | Mouse Jokes | Rabbit Jokes, Hare Humor | Animal Poop Puns |
| Insect Puns | Bee Jokes | Spider Jokes | Frog Jokes, Toad Puns | Snake Jokes | Fish Jokes |
| Vet Jokes | Scary Animal Jokes | Animal Music Jokes | Animal Pick-Up Lines | Xmas Animals |

Sheep Says to a Leopard: Caturday is not for the meek!Chimps ask: What do you call bananas that are friends with monkeys? A. A bunch of idiots!Q. What do you get if you cross a lamb and a rocket? A. Space Sheep!

Q. What did the lioness say to her cub who was chasing a hunter?
A. Son, don't play with your food.

Q. What do you call a cheetah running a Xerox machine?
A. A copy cat.

Q. What do you call a sheep with no head and no legs?
A. A cloud.

Pick Up a Lion Cub Line: Meow.

Q. What did the monkey say when he cut off his tail?
A. It won't be long now...

Q. Where should a monkey go if he loses his tail?
A. To his local retailer!

Q. What do cheeky chimps and monkeys do for laughs?
A. They tell jokes about people, and bananas.

Q. What do sheep wear at work?
A. Ewe-niforms.

Q. What does an ambitious sheep want?
A. To wool the world.

Q. Why did the lamb call the police?
A. He'd been fleeced!

Q. Why was the lamb arrested on the freeway?
A. Because she whipped a ewe turn.

A horse walks into a bar. Bartender confuses idioms with jokes and offers him a glass of water, but he ca't make him drink it!You might be from Colorado if you use bear-proof trash cans!What do you get if you cross an alien and a kangaroo? A. A Mars-Upial!

A horse walks into a bar. Bartender says, "Hey." Horse says, "Yes please. And can I get a beer with that?"

Bag of fertilizer walks into a bar. Bartender says, "You can come in, but don't give me any sh*t."

Q. Why was the horse naked?
A. Because his jockey fell off.

Horsey Pick-Up Line: Hay girl, aren't you tired? 'Cause you've been galloping through my mind all evening.

Q. How do you catch fish without a fishing rod?
A. Just use your bear hands!

Q. How do you apologize to a bruin?
A. Bear your heart and soul.

Q. What do you call a bear with no ear?
A. B.

Q. Why are polar bears such popular party guests?
A. Because they really know how to break the ice.

Q. What does a kangaroo say about the time he lost the high-jump competition?
A. I roo the day...

Q. What do you get if you cross a kangaroo and a calendar?
A. Leap Year.

Q. What do you call a lazy baby kangaroo?
A. A Pouch Potato!

Q. What did Mrs. Kangaroo expect her hubby to do with today's to-do list?
A. Hop to it!

Q. How many gorillas does it take to change a light bulb? A. One one, but it takes a butt load of Bud Light!Q. How do monkeys et down stairs? A. They slidw down the banana-ster!Who do you call when mosquitoes attack? A. The SWAT team!

Q. What do ape attorneys study?
A. The law of the jungle.

King Kong Pick-Up Line: Babe, I'm falling for you!

Q. Which gorilla gal made it into the Playboy calendar?
A. Miss Ape-ril.

Q. What do ape attorneys study?
A. The law of the jungle.

Q. What did the monkey say after he slid down the flagpole?
A. Goodness gracious, great balls of fire!

Q. How did the dog warn his master a big ape was approaching?
A. He barked, "grrrri-i-lla."

Q. Why shouldn't you get into a battle with monkeys?
A. They use gorilla warefare.

Q. Which insect has great baseball skills?
A. The Pop Fly.

Q. Why don't vampires like mosquitoes?
A. Too much competition!

Q. What is a mosquito's favorite sport?
A. Skin Diving.

Q. How did Samuel Gertler come up with the idea for his mosquito repellant patten in 1946?
A. He started from scratch.

Q. Why was Dick Grayson called Robin? A. Calling him Early Bird sounded silly!Q. Which era do pothead fossil hounds dig most? A. The Stone Age!Q. If a crocodile makes shoes, what does a banana make? A. Slippers!

Q. How do robins stay so fit?
A. They do lots of morning worm-ups.

Q. Why do crows tell really dumb jokes?
A. Just be-caws!

Q. Who stole the soap?
A. The robber ducky!

Q. Why do birds fly south?
A. Because it's too far to walk.

Q. What do you call a large dog that meditates?
A. Aware-wolf.

Q. Which breed of dog tells off-color jokes?
A. A sMutt!

Q. What do you call a dog magician?
A. A labra-ca-dabra-dor.

Q. What is the fastest dog breed?
A. The Labra-ghini!

Q. Why shouldn't you taunt a crocodile?
A. It might come back to bite you in the end!

Q. What do you get if you cross an alligator and a poisonous frog?
A. A croak-odile.

Q. What do you get if you cross a crocodile and a rooster?
A. Croc-a-doodle-do!

Q. What do you call an alligator drug addict?
A. A crackodile.

| Wildly Funny Wild Animal Jokes | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | 14 | 15 |
| Gorilla Jokes and Big Ape Puns | Bigfoot Jokes | Sasquatch Jokes | Colorado Bigfoot Jokes |
| Cheeky Monkey Jokes | Stoner Monkey Jokes | 2 | Animal Pothead Puns | Animal Bar Jokes |
| Elephant Jokes, Mammoth Puns | Lion Jokes, Big Cat Puns | Colorado Wildlife Jokes | 2 | 3 |
| Bear Jokes | Deer Jokes | Mouse Jokes, Rat Puns | Rabbit Jokes, Hare Puns | Animal Poop Puns |
| Insect Puns | Bee Jokes | Spider Jokes | Frog Jokes, Toad Puns | Snake Jokes, Reptile Puns |
| Vet Jokes | Scary Animal Jokes | Animal Music Jokes | Animal Pick-Up Lines | Xmas Animals |
| Duck Jokes, Goose Puns | Fish Jokes | Finny Fish Puns | Sports Animal Jokes | Bronco Puns |
| Farm Animals | Chicken Jokes | Cow Puns | Donkey Puns | Horse Jokes | Pig Puns | Sheep Puns |
| Pet Animal Puns | Bird Jokes | Pet Cat Jokes | Feline Puns | Dog Jokes | 2 | Pet Rodent Jokes |


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You've run wild this far, so here's even more wolfish laughter,
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